Neal Milner is a former political science professor at the University of Hawai驶i where he taught for 40 years. He is a political analyst for KITV and is a regular contributor to Hawaii Public Radio's His most recent book is Opinions are the author's own and do not necessarily reflect Civil Beat's views.
Our new lieutenant governor Sylvia Luke put some humor into her recent inauguration speech. It went OK.
Mike McCartney used humor in his last appearance as DBEDT director. BOOM! Much more than OK. He was top of the charts, hysterically funny.
Luke鈥檚 jokes were careful and intentional. McCartney wasn鈥檛 trying to be funny at all. That鈥檚 what made his bit so richly comic. Or tragicomic.
This is how political humor works: Two salmon walk into a bar. The bartender says, 鈥淗ow did you fish get in? Hey, Tony, change the lox.鈥
Pretty cheesy. I made it up 鈥斅燼 grandpa joke. My granddaughter would groan more than she would laugh.
It鈥檚 different, though, if the jokester is a well-known public official. Suddenly that joke is right out of Chris Rock.
Luke鈥檚 inauguration jokes were wry, quasi-insider jokes, making fun of herself and her former colleagues in the Legislature.
Low key, no slipping the microphone off the stand and prancing around throwing f-bombs and talking about body parts. Much closer to a Chuck Schumer than to Amy Schumer.
Luke鈥檚 humor was a welcome relief from the usual big-day bluster. But baddah boom baddah-bing-wise?聽 Let鈥檚 just say she got the job done with requisite skill and grace.
But she shouldn鈥檛 give up her day job. Wait, she just did.
Still, if she had used my salmon joke, it would have brought down the house 鈥 and the Senate.
When public officials try to be funny they are held to a different and lower standard than the rest of us. All of a sudden, they鈥檙e comedians.
From the reactions in the media, you鈥檇 think that Luke had debuted as a cast member on Saturday Night Live. 鈥淲ow, she can be funny. Who knew?鈥
That鈥檚 a big overreaction, and it鈥檚 unfair because it dehumanizes her. It makes it seem that the way Luke worked in the House as a tough, flinty chair of the money committee totally defines her. Damning her with faint praise.
The French take it to the next level by giving an annual grand prize for humor and politics. (The French have no regular prizes. All their prizes are grand.)
This year鈥檚 winner was Fabien Roussel who is, get this 鈥 the
The only award a dirty Commie can get in the U.S. is a prisoner exchange.
Here鈥檚 Roussel鈥檚 winning joke: 鈥淭he petrol station is the only place where the one holding the gun is also the one who is robbed.鈥
You had to be there. It works much better in French where “pistolet” means both a pistol and the petrol pump. Still, .
Before President Barack Obama鈥檚 famous White House Correspondents鈥 Dinner monologue, emcee Jimmy Kimmel said that Obama “could probably be a comedian himself if he wanted to.”
Obama has excellent comedic timing. He knows how to deliver lines. But there is a difference between what he did at the dinner and a what a professional comic does.
Larry Jacobs, an eminent , didn’t think Obama was that funny. “,” he said.
Considering politician humor, Jacobs said, “We have to discount the scripted comments. The White House Correspondents dinner is now farmed out to professional comedy writers.鈥
Maybe Jacobs was having a bad day. Maybe he woke up on the wrong side of an unfinished manuscript.
But he鈥檚 right. Stand-up comics today write their own material. Obama in this case and probably in many others did not. That鈥檚 true of many politicians, especially the big shots.
Jacob鈥檚 Obama assessment is brutal, but trust me, the hallmark of us political scientists is that we speak our minds even if it costs us dearly:
Larry Jacobs walks into a bar. The bartender says, 鈥淣o birth certificate, No service.鈥
Two political scientists walk into a bar. No one cares.
And that brings us back to McCartney who is not important enough to have a retinue of comedy writers at his disposal.
But the thing is, he doesn鈥檛 need it. He is naturally funny. So what if it is unintentional.
Considering how things work in Hawaii, there should be an annual prize for unintentional political humor. Call this award The Oy La La Prize.
The 2022 Oy La La winner? Mike McCartney, for his one-liner: 鈥淲e鈥檙e still learning.鈥
McCartney brought his DBEDT term to a close first by botching the new stadium plans, then by administering a botch to the tourism contract.
Worse, or better in terms of the prize, he tried to defend them with actual public statements. Being intentional made it worse. That was of course unintentional. The beat goes on.
Put aside the stadium, which was mainly Gov. David Ige鈥檚 doing anyway, and focus on McCartney鈥檚 award-winning off-the-cuff tourism remarks.
McCartney鈥檚 contract blundering was too much even for the usually sedate Honolulu Star-Advertiser editorial writers who , (which the Urban Dictionary defines as 鈥淲hen an odor is so fucking bad that you have to hold your nose because the .鈥)
When asked at a hearing (face towels recommended but not required) why after two rounds of what should have been a competitive but procedurally straightforward procurement process, it still got messed up again, Mike delivered his award-winning 鈥淲e鈥檙e still learning鈥 zinger.
Oy, Mike. Oy vey. It was so close to the end of McCartney鈥檚 term that his Uber was already outside idling to take him on his ride into the sunset, and McCartney said he鈥檚 still learning.
Mike, the pistolet holder robbing us, the public. Baddah-bing!
Sylvia Luke no doubt had some help with her speech. There are people in Hawaii who are very good at this. Jimmy Kimmel has never heard of them. Neither has Larry Jacobs.
Her writers would probably tell Luke that she did a good job, and that maybe next time she could build on her confidence by punching it up and stretching a little bit. 鈥淵ou can do it. We can help.鈥
Here鈥檚 all the help Mike McCartney needs to hone his award-winning skills: 鈥淛ust stand up and say the first thing that comes into your head. Then say the second thing. Then the third, and the fourth.”
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Neal Milner is a former political science professor at the University of Hawai驶i where he taught for 40 years. He is a political analyst for KITV and is a regular contributor to Hawaii Public Radio's His most recent book is Opinions are the author's own and do not necessarily reflect Civil Beat's views.
Mr. McCartney reminds of that game Whack-a-Mole芒聙娄except that without ever getting whacked, he just pops up again somewhere. Hmmm芒聙娄I guess it helps to have friends in high places.
Chillax·
2 years ago
With all the years Mike had been associated with the Tourist Industry you'd think he should be an expert by now. How did he get into those high powered position when he's still learning?
kealoha1938·
2 years ago
He might be trying to replace Augie T. Ah, but Augie is funny yet gets the job done by taking his position seriously. He should be our next mayor. Even without a ton of experience he would be better than what we have now since his cabinet would be made up of people who really care about Hawaii and it's people.
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