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Editor’s note: This is one of a series of Community Voices about the experiences of those who provide care for elderly family members and other kupuna.

My great-grandma has lived with my great-uncle ever since she was 50 years old, after she became a widow.

At first, she had the ability to take care of herself. In fact, she had so much energy that she would wake up at 6 o’clock in the morning to go for a walk. Then she would come home around 7 o’clock to make breakfast for the whole family. Afterwards, she would go out to the garden to water the plants, feed the turtles, and play with the dog.

But as she got older, she became more fragile and reliant on others. Once she reached 70 years old, she slowly stopped her daily routine of going on walks, making breakfast, and going out to the garden.

Eventually, she was not even capable of driving herself to her doctor appointments that was only 20 minutes away by car. As a result, she depended on my great-uncle to drive her places because they were living together.

Every morning, my great-uncle or his wife would wake up and pre-make her breakfast and lunch. Then they would go to work and leave her at home by herself. When they came home from work, my great-uncle would prepare dinner while his wife drew her a bath and washed her clothes. After dinner, he would help her to the living room where she enjoyed watching television while eating fruits.

Sometimes my grandpa would go visit her, see how she was doing, and help her with anything that she needed assistance with. This meant a lot to my great-grandma because she was always by herself when her son was at work, so when my grandpa visited her it helped her pass time and have some human interaction with people besides my great-uncle and aunt.

After a few years, she started to become more ill due to old age and had to go to the doctor more frequently. This affected my great-uncle heavily because he was forced to take off of work and find somebody to cover his shifts. Since this occurred about twice a month, it became difficult for him to receive a steady income to support his family.

A couple months later, my great-uncle discussed this matter with all his other brothers to seek a better solution to care for his mother. They had thought about taking her to a care home, but she wanted to be closer to family. Then they thought about hiring a caretaker, but it was too expensive. So the final decision was for everyone to split up the duties in order to give her the proper care that she needed.

Recently, about two years ago she was home alone and she fell. Luckily, my great-uncle walked through the door just moments later. He rushed her to the hospital and the doctor said that she broke her arm and that she needed physical therapy in order for her arm to fully heal.

Around this time, my great-uncle and his wife had just retired, so everything was piling up on them. They had to pay for their house, car, utilities, all while watching over my great-grandma.

Even though my great-grandma had some funds saved up, most of the money was coming out of my uncle’s pocket. Moreover, whenever my uncle wanted to go visit his kids and grandkids in Oregon, he would have to see when his brothers were available to watch over his mother.

This was difficult because everyone has jobs, families, and other responsibilities. Thus, the burden of taking care of my great-grandma fell greatly on my great-uncle because he lived with her.

In conclusion, it is crucial to provide some type of long-term care assistance for everyone because many families cannot manage on their own.

If my great-grandma was capable of hiring a caregiver, then my great-uncle would have had the ability to focus on his job rather than constantly taking off to take care of her. In addition, she would have received better care because the caregiver can tend to her needs right away rather than having to wait until my great-uncle comes home.

It is important for the legislators to look into this issue, especially the because many elders are lacking proper care, and many families are stressed. Moreover, if the government does not assist these elderlies, then more families will end up in a cycle of debt. This is due to the fact that they have to choose between either their jobs or families; and many decide to focus on taking care of their families, and as a result sacrifice their jobs and their income.